"A chronic headache and a couple of wonky eyes": Understanding how strabismus relates to body image and body functionality. A thematic analysis of autoethnographic narratives.

Strabismus, a condition of misaligned eyes, has the potential to negatively affect quality of life through psychosocial and functional implications. This study adopts an analytical autoethnography to tell my story of living with strabismus and undergoing medical treatments. It considers these experiences through the lenses of body image and body functionality. Five autoethnographic narratives were analysed abductively using thematic analysis and the findings are presented as extracts from the narratives. Six themes were identified: (1) Thoughts and feelings focussed on body functionality, (2) Negative thoughts and feelings related to appearance, (3) Perceptual distortion, (4) Conflicts between functional and appearance elements, (5) Adaptive behaviours related to functionality, (6) Coping behaviours related to appearance. This study demonstrates the conflict between appearance and functional components of strabismus and contributes to the theoretical development of the visible difference literature. The study also highlights the importance of patient voice in visible difference conditions.